i eat cake everyday because i know somewhere out there, it’s someone’s birthday
Once you start dating someone its like, impossible to insult them
"suck my dick" ok
“bite me” hell yeah
"kiss my ass" sure
"Fuck you" well if you insist.
"my mother was right about you, you’re pathetic, you’ve got no job, and you’ve got no future" if you insist
I hate it when you really need to talk to a friend about something important because you feel like your world is crashing down on you but they act like you don’t exist until their problems occur.
I want a show where either
- Gordon Ramsey has to sing for Simon Cowell and then Simon has to cook for Ramsey and they both just criticize each other.
- A contestant has to cook for Ramsey and then sing for Simon. You win if you can survive the psychological damage